eating fest 2013.

So I went to the doctor today. My tests came back great! Because things have fluctuated out of normal, I should just be mindful and listen to my body. If something's wrong, the right thing to do is call them.

But what a relief.

Well, that was a relief. 

I'm not overly stressed because I have a full plan of how to make up for this next part. I haven't gained enough weight. To be completely honest, I KNOW this. I knew it from quite a bit earlier.

But all these women told me, "oh how lucky are you? You look so great," "You're going to have nothing to lose after the baby!" (Which I was thinking was stellar for my sister's wedding next year) And my favorite, "oh I was the same way and it ALL came later."

So here I am - well knowing that I haven't gained what I was supposed to - but justifying it because other people did. When the doctor started with, "we have something we need to talk about", I wasn't entirely surprised. She asked what was going on, curious if I had been trying not to gain. 

I hadn't been dieting purposely but I just don't eat as much as I used to. Food often smells and doesn't appeal to me. I feel like drinking an ensure for lunch satisfies me. And I do think when you're pregnant you don't want to become a cow so you don't feel like eating extra calories.

The doctor told me I'm not a big enough person to be gaining less weight during pregnancy. She told me it's essential for Hartley's brain development for me to eat lots of protein and gain weight. She told me studies show the healthiest babies have moms that gain the recommended 25 pounds. She told me the women who say it all comes later were probably up more than 5 pounds at almost 25 weeks. I'm literally 2 weeks away from the third trimester with a 5 pound gain, and it's nothing to be proud of.

I really didn't do this intentionally. And I do want Hartley to develop a normal, healthy body so I'm getting serious from here on out. So I went to the store and bought hard boiled eggs, cheese and nuts. I'm going to eat my six meals a day. I hope I can make things right starting today :)

I hope I get as big as a house. And I'll just tack this weight on to the amount I already wanted to lose post baby. Since I currently plan on only having 1 kid, I'm just going to healthily lose my baby weight (plus some) after all of this and hopefully maintain it so our little girl always has a healthy mom.

I also hope to be a good example for Hartley. I completely admit that I haven't always had a very healthy attitude towards weight. And it will probably be a reoccurring struggle throughout my life but I need to clean up my act so my little girl doesn't think that's the way it should be.