But this has been my work since day two of her life when the crying really began.
Her early cries were partially due to just adjusting to a whole new world, so completely foreign to her. But there were also hunger cries as she wasn't getting enough to eat. Enter formula supplementation. This helped and soothed crying for a bit.
Then there were meltdowns of frustration while breastfeeding. We switched to exclusively bottle feeding and the meltdowns exited.
We were told to start vitamin d supplements. I gave them to her in the evening, and both nights she cried for several hours straight. We decided to stop them, and those crying bouts stopped.
My mom, aka baby genius, noticed Hartley seemed to have GI issues: straining herself a lot, being gassy, tummy gurgling. It was pretty funny when my mother in law was holding Hartley and insisted, "yep, she's pooping. I know. I can just tell. Brian, go ahead and change her." Both Brian and I were thinking, nope, it's just the usual "fake out". We called them fake outs, unknowing it was actually an issue. Lo and behold, there was no poop in that diaper. My mom suggested it could be a milk allergy. We switched to soy, and the trouble vanished.
She then got a diaper rash so bad it bled. Finally found a cream that worked, no more crying when pooping. That is until adjusting to soy made her stools hard to pass, then crying came back. And I learned an ounce of apple juice unstops things.
Whew, that was a lot of troubleshooting over 5 weeks time.
In the beginning we'd say she was a fussy baby, and anyone who spent substantial time with her concurred. There are those people who visit an hour or two, hold a sleeping baby, and they'd say she was an easy baby. Oh if only they knew. And I felt so justified when my mom, who raised 3 babies, would point out the fussiness so I knew it wasn't just Brian and I being helpless first timers.
But I'll say this, I'm glad I didn't settle of labeling my baby as "having colic". I looked for patterns. My mom looked for patterns. And I'm sure the trouble shooting will continue. The crying that remains I don't call "colic". I chalk it up to her mood or personality. Sometimes she doesn't mind being held, and sometimes she likes being held if you walk her around and show her things or wear her. But sometimes she likes to play independently on a mat so she can stretch and flail. And sometimes she's overly tired and needs to be soothed in her swing or left to wind down in her rock n play. And I'm guessing half of the time but I'm learning as I guess.
And babies cry. They do. And you can try to soothe them but the tears will flow. Ugh, the overly tired tears flow, and it's a vicious cycle. When that happens, I sing to her. Not sweet songs. More like funny songs to calm and soothe myself - ones I just make up. "Oh my god, why are you crying? I need a glass of wine. Let's ask dad if he wants to be a stay at home dad." *Think Buddy the Elf singing what he is doing* And I laugh. And it gets better.
But in our house - trouble shooting vs. colic? We choose trouble shooting. And the tears we can't solve? Babies cry. It's not colic. It's my baby being a crier. And during the long stints when Brian is home, we take turns. Because it can drive a sane person nuts.
And side note: alert/difficult babies (Hartley, I don't really think you're difficult - dad says "finicky") are supposed to be very intelligent. From the research I've done, when babies don't cry or fuss, it's often a sign of issues. Babies who are always awake and looking around and can be picky = earliest sign of genius. So if you have a tough cookie, do what I do. Remind yourself you could have the next Bill Gates on your hands and play your cards right so she buys you a bad ass mansion someday.
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